Arrrrgggghhhh.!!..!!!!
Dec 10th, 2008 by craig
I’m the first to admit: I have an addiction to chocolate covered peanuts. Sometimes we’ll get a bag of them from the bulk section of our local market, and I’ll put them away easily at a pound a day pace – but only if I really try to refrain from putting them away all at once. They’re just too good a snack to let sit. One time, someone had mixed just a few chocolate covered raisins into the bulk bin, so as I was enjoying my peanuts, every now and then there would be a raisin. Not at all an unpleasant experience. In fact, I’ve taken to mixing chocolate covered raisins in with my chocolate covered peanuts – I’ve found the perfect mix to be about four to one, peanuts to raisins.
However, recently I had an experience with my chocolate peanuts that has scarred me for life. Literally, I have been scarred for the rest of my life. I was enjoying my snacks when I bit into something so horrible I had no control over the immediate expulsion of whatever it was: I immediately, and without regard to anything around me spit it out of my mouth. It was like a spit take, but a spit take on steroids. There, completely camouflaged, mixed in with my chocolate peanuts, was a chocolate covered coffee bean! Covering coffee beans in chocolate seems to me the ultimate atrocity. Sign of the apocalypse? No, when they start covering coffee beans in chocolate, the apocalypse has come and gone.
Some would argue that the real culprit is whoever dumped those, those… evil things into my peanuts, but chocolate covered coffee beans are such an abomination that they shouldn’t be allowed to exist at all. Are we really supposed to eat those nasty things? It’s like eating peanut shells, but without the redeeming quality of a cardboard taste. Aren’t they just immature coffee grounds? And no one would consider eating coffee grounds. I really can’t imagine a worse thing to bite down on. Is there anyone out there that actually eats those things?
I may learn to cope with my chocolate peanut addition, but I’ll never get over that horrific coffee bean experience.
LOL…. i was ready to read that you’d bitten into a chocolate covered bug or something! As you know, I like a little chocolate with my nuts – but never have been a fan of coffee or coffee beans. I have, however, tried some chocolate covered espresso beans from Chukar Cherries. Not my favorite – but pretty good – definitely not horrible. And a real caffeine kick! But I think I’ll stick with my chocolate covered almonds, cashews, macadamias and hazelnuts.
How will you ever recover from this life scarring event???
Aren’t espresso beans and coffee beans the same thing? I just read on wikipedia that: “A common misconception about espresso is that it is a specific bean or roast level. Any bean or roasting level can be used to produce authentic espresso. ” I know, to each his own, but I could never bring myself anywhere near to “pretty good…” when it involves those #*%^ coffee beans…
That is funny, well not funny but I too thought it was going to be a bug or something. I have never tasted coffee… or the beans for that matter, are they really that bad? I too have an addection. In fact all of us here in the Erickson household are addicted to orange sticks (aaaaa, that is the heaven music playing in the back ground!!!) We LOVE these things. I can easly down a box by myself in five minutes. Dillon is obsessed and so is Chris. We now have come to the “no sharing our box” rule in this house because we are all accusing eachother of eating too much. Need a cheap Christams present? Send us all your unwanted boxes of orange sticks… yum yum!!!
I agree with you, that would scar me for life to. Coffee taste is VERY nasty. I hope you can continue your love for chocolate covered peanuts. If not, have you tried Chocolate covered gummy bears!! Oh those are YUMMY!!!!!!
Heather, have you had the raspberry versions of those orange sticks? Man, those are also very, very good. I can’t imagine there actually being any “unwanted boxes of orange sticks” around, they’re always wanted….
Jamie, I have tried the chocolate covered gummy bears, but I can’t eat any kind of gummy bears without remembering them sliced in half by glass tables….
What do you mean dad? Or do I want to know??
Weren’t you one of those that would split a gummy bear in half, stick the bottom half to the bottom side of a glass table and the top half to the top side of the the table so it looked like the table just went through him?
No Dad, that was just me and Kris…. I will never forget that!
oh… so you’re responsible for my gummy bear issues… still not as bad as coffee beans in my peanuts though…